It's Harder Than It Seems!
by Keaton's Firefly
Summary: It really is harder than it seems, isn't it? The most innocent and common of actions can be the hardest thing when you try it for the first time. Just ask Artemis. Though, again, he delights in not talking.
1. Blowing Mud Boys to Kingdom Come

**A.N:** Hallo everybody! How y'all doing today? I'm dandy. Just a wee bit tired. And yet, judging by writing also on sugar…0.o;;; Funny. Haven't had any sugar for awhile. (what's wrong with this statement?) Anywho, yes, it's a new fanfic! With nearly no forward notice at all! This started out as a simple idea…an innocent idea to turn things in the Artemis Fowl world topsy-turvy. It WAS going to be a one-shot. But if you know me, one-shots and me don't make sense. So, this is now a five-chapter story…Yup…

**Disclaimer:** (Hmmmm…Haven't done these for awhile…Ah yes…) holds pen above head brings it quickly down onto paper begins to write furiously looks at paper sniffs and holds up paper for all to see Paper: I **don't** own Artemis Fowl! Me: I tried to write I do own Artemis Fowl, but see, like in Liar, Liar, I can't lie. It's the Curse of the Lawyers…

_**It's Harder Than it Seems!**_

**Blowing Mud Boys to Kingdom Come**

Ops Booth, Haven.

"You needed me for something, Foaly?" Artemis Fowl walked into the Operations Booth, rubbing his temples. An angry Commander Root was not someone you wanted to bump into.

Foaly turned around in his specifically modified chair and stood up. "Yup. Punctual, aren't you?" He cantered over to the pale boy.

"I do try," Artemis sighed and nodded. "So, what do you want?"

"Straight to business then," Foaly rubbed his palms together in excitement and guided Artemis over to a large, cylindrical device that had an inside resembling a hot shots pod. "This is the Morpher. This will ease the tension of blending in aboveground for the Recon officers."

"I repeat myself, why do you need me?"

"Well, since Julius wouldn't let me try it out on one of his 'precious officers' or him, I decided-"

"To try it out on me," Artemis finished, his eyes narrowing in apprehension. "You're sure it's safe?"

Foaly sniffed. "Of course it's safe. I invented it with safety being the top priority."

"And that's why nobody wanted to be the one to try it out."

"Oh, come on. I'm a genius, trust me," Foaly shooed Artemis into the interior.

Artemis groaned as he let himself be pushed into the small space. "The line between genius and insanity is very fine, Foaly."

The unappreciated genius ignored the comment.

Holly peered into Trouble Kelp's cubicle, her head turning from side to side.

"Can I help you Short?"

"Have you seen Artemis, Kelp? I heard he was down here today."

"Haven't seen him, but I know he's helping Foaly with some new equipment."

"Oh."

"Why?"

"I just thought I'd ask Artemis about something from the past."

"You just found an instance where he pulled a fast one on you, didn't you?"

"To say the least," Holly growled as she stalked out to go find the 'defenseless' Mud boy. "When I get my hands on you Artemis Fowl…"

Artemis shifted his weight nervously as Foaly typed in a few key codes.

"Tell me again Foaly, why I agreed to be your guinea pig."

"Because in order to retain your memories and keep in touch with the People you have to help me out wherever you can. Not like I need it."

"But of course."

"Are you ready?" Foaly grinned, an evil glint in his eyes.

"As ready as I'll ever be," Artemis took a long, soothing breath and closed his eyes, trying to ignore the violent tingle snaking up his body.

Multicolored smoke filled the Ops Booth as the machine whirred to a stop. Foaly coughed and brushed it away as he made his way to the Morpher. He wondered if he had done it, if he had truly turned Artemis into an elf. After all, the machine's whole purpose was to make elves appear to be human, so it should work vice-versa, right?

He was so wrong; his jaw hit the ground harder than Mulch's teeth when he saw what he had done.

Holly sighed and finally returned to her cubicle. She'd run into him sooner or later, and she had to get some paper work done anyways. Darn it all, it seemed Trouble and some of his buddies had gotten less than her so they were on break in the courtyard. Some people had all the luck.

"Oh well, may as well get started," Holly murmured from behind a pen cap. She looked down just in time to see a stream of smoke float by. "What the. What is that centaur and Irish kid up to now? This had better not cause me any trouble."

How right she was. But it would also cause her some amount of childish joy.

Foaly had to do a double take to make sure he wasn't dreaming. He had made Artemis disappear. He was gone. Just a smoke cloud, nothing more. He wouldn't hear the end of it. He had terminated Artemis Fowl. He didn't even want to think about damages. Holly would kill him (if Root hadn't gotten to him first).

So, just to make sure he was right, he tentatively called out. "Artemis? Please tell me I haven't blown you to microscopic fragments…"

A small sputtering sound came from the machine, almost of disbelief. But, it could've just been the machine itself.

Foaly gulped and looked down in dismay. And as the smoke cleared, lo and behold, was Artemis Fowl II. The centaur gaped, then burst into raucous rounds of laughter, all gloom gone.

"It-it-it's s-so CUTE!" He whinnied, collapsing onto the ground in a fit of giggles.

**A.N** Dum dum dum! What will happen? Will Foaly ever stop laughing? Will Holly ever find Artemis? What's so cute about Artemis? (besides his entire being)… Will Root ever make an appearance? Find out on the next installment of **_It's Harder Than It Seems! _**

**P.S.** What do YOU think has happened to Artemis? Review and tell me! I wanna know!

_**Thank Yous- **Thank you sooooo much to my sister for being my test reader and for giving me encouragement! I love you!_


	2. The Cuteness Appears

**A.N** Oh my gosh! Five reviews? Already? I love you guys! So, here's another chapter! I hope you guys enjoy it!

**Disclaimer:** _sighes_ I don't own Artemis Fowl, but I DO control him and all the other charas! Ha! _lawyers growl_ Neat loophole, huh?

**P.S. **Thank yous will be listed at the bottom!

_**It's Harder Than it Seems!**_

**The Cuteness Appears**

Operations Booth

Artemis scoffed. 'Me? Cute? That's a new one.' He shook his head as he opened his eyes and immediately noticed something was horribly wrong. From what he could tell from his line of vision he was not even a foot tall. Suddenly, Foaly slapped his hand down near Artemis's shrunken self, scaring the poor Mud boy. He jumped back on all fours, landing on his feet at the back of the cylindrical device, took a deep breath, and subconsciously let out the most absurd noise imaginable.

Foaly looked down just in time to see Artemis the kitten hiss at him, his soft black ears pressed all the way back. His feathery soft fur stuck up in all directions and his ethereal blue eyes narrowed. The centaurian technician just laughed harder and patted Artemis on the head. You can imagine what our favorite criminal mastermind looked like after that. Shocked and indignant.

"Oh, come on. It's not like it's permanent."

Artemis raised a patch of fur where his eyebrow would and should be.

Foaly sighed and managed to stand up and trot over to his chair, motioning for Artemis to follow. Artemis padded over in an undeniably adorable way and leapt onto the desk. He gave Foaly a look that clearly said, 'How so?'

"Well, you see, I had to include a way for the Morpher to turn back to their original form."

'You mean victim.'

"Aheh" Foaly eyed the mutinous kitten warily. He just hoped Butler would hear neither hide nor tail of this little slip up. "Okay. Since you're not an elf, the normal way to turn back will not apply to you"

'Which is?'

"To try and use the _mesmer_. Fairies still have magic, regardless of their state of being. And thus, being the genius that I am"

'You mean insane,' Artemis twitched his tail.

"-I decided that the trigger would be the vibration of the throat that is made when fairies release the _mesmer_."

'And?'

Foaly leaned back and pretended to think on how to make the trigger work for a feline. "You have to purr."

'I beg your pardon!' Artemis took a step back, though he had figured it out as soon as Foaly had mentioned _mesmer_. He had just hoped he was wrong, a very rare thing.

"What? It's the only way" Foaly shrugged. "Fine. Stay a cute, fuzzy kitten forever."

Artemis gave Foaly a death glare and took a deep breath. It was really a simple concept if you thought about it. Artemis was sure he could pull it off on the first try. He thought about the noise and let it out, only to-

"H-HaCk" That's right, folks. Artemis was coughing and hacking and choking like a cat about to exhale a fur ball. Of course, nothing came out, but the show of it sure gave Foaly a laugh.

Artemis laid down and sighed, trying to devise a way to kill Foaly when he was pocket size.

"Well, that didn't work," Foaly scratched his head. "Cats and kitties purr when they are extremely content. So, maybe…Nah, we're talking about Artemis Fowl here." He looked at the dismayed, unlucky black kitty through the corners of his eyes. "Hmmmmm…Wait a minute!" Foaly leaned in close to Artemis with a foreboding smile on his face. "You **really** like Holly, don't you Mud boy?"

Artemis took a step back, his eyes widening for a moment before he sat down firmly and turned his head away and his nose up, whiskers twitching indifferently. 'This whole situation has unnerved me. I have to regain my footing,' Artemis's nose tipped up in confidence for a moment, his furry chest puffing out just a little. 'On four furry paws…' Artemis forced his ears to perk.

"Geez. It's really obvious. No sense in acting indifferent about it."

'It…is?' Artemis's ears went down as his shoulders hunched. Needless to say, all confidence and 'puffage' was deflated.

"Well, to a genius like me it is. All the signs are there, everyone else is just too ignorant to notice."

Artemis's ears laid back all the way, but this time instead of looking pathetic, he looked menacing. In a cute…sort-a way. 'If you're such a genius, then get me out of this body!'

"Alright, alright Mud whelp!" Foaly leaned back. "We just……"

Artemis waited for the centaur to concoct what he was sure to be a ridiculous attempt at a scheme.

"I got it!"

Artemis raised a skeptical, nonexistent eyebrow.

"You just have to act like my new kitten, conveniently run away, and bump into Holly!"

The disgust and disbelief that hung in the room was so thick you could cut it with a knife.

'Uh huh.'

"Fine. Like I said, I don't need your help. So you could just stay a kitten forever. At least it shuts you up."

Artemis's eye twitched. He would live to regret this.

Foaly grinned ear to ear and plucked the kitten by the scruff of the neck, placing him in the crook of his arm. As he cantered out of his Ops Booth, he began to pet the kitty rough enough to muss up said fluff ball's fur. Artemis glowered. 'The centaur's enjoying this way too much.'

**A.N **Hm. Interesting, eh? Poor, poor Artemis. He's right, Foaly is enjoying the privilege of petting Artemis too much. I mean, seriously, let other people pet him! ……Like me……………Anywho, review! (the rhyming returns! Bwa ha ha ha ha ha! says it out loud Well, it KINDA rhymes….) Look out for the next chapter! It'll knock you off your feet! Or Artemis's.._cough_ hint _cough_

**P.S. **And always remember to press the little button to the left that says "Go" before you leave! Make my day!

**_Thank yous-_ La vampiress- **Thanks for reviewing! Glad I made you laugh!

**HollyShortgirl- **Thank you sooo much! I'm glad you like it! Elf? Already seen it done, but good guess! Baby? Awww! That would be funny!

**Chaos- **ReAlLy! bounces up and down Yay yay yay yay yay yay YAY! Thank you soo much! Bunny? Cute, but no. Kitty? BINGO WE HAVE A WINNER!

**Black Aliss- **Glad you liked it! Thank you!

**IhateBeetroot- **Thanks for reviewing! It only gets stranger from here on out.


	3. PiNgPoNgHOCKEY PUCK!

**A.N** SqUeE! I absolutely love you guys! So, here's ANOTHER chapter! AND I'll try my hardest to update another fanfic and even my existing ones and you guys helped MAKE MY DAY! I LOVE YOU!

**Disclaimer:** Hmmmmmmmmmm…………I'm out of disclaimers at the moment. Does this mean I get sued? _lawyers nod_ Aw crud.

**P.S **Thank yous as always are at the bottom and I don't own Artemis Fowl.

_**It's Harder Than it Seems!**_

**PiNg-PoNg-HOCKEY PUCK!**

LEP Headquarters, Haven

Root took a breath and felt the small satisfaction of yelling at one of his many officers, one of the many joys of being a commander. Now he was going to check if pony boy had done anything useful in the past hour. Handy that Foaly met him halfway, unfortunately Root, upon seeing the grinning centaur, wished he hadn't even moved a finger away from his desk that day.

"Me-Rawr!" Artemis tried to desperately move himself away from Foaly's evil, hairy hand.

Root almost dropped his fungus cigar. "What….Is…….ThAt!" He screamed, his face turning the shade of a ripe plum.

"Oh, hallo Julius!"

"Don't you 'hallo Julius' me, pony boy! Just tell me that is not what I think it is!"

"Well, what do YOU think it is, Julius?"

"I think it's a Mud kitten, but it had better be mechanical. And one more thing."

"Yes Julius?" Foaly rolled his eyes toward the ceiling, already knowing what was to come.

"DON'T CALL ME JULIUS, CIVILIAN!"

Foaly winced at the sheer volume of the commander's voice. "Sheesh, no need to grind your cigar into slimy dust, commander."

"So, is it?" Root fumed.

"Is what?"

"The hairy 'thing' in your hairy arms."

"Oh, yeah. It's real."

"How?" Root hissed, his face looking like it could fry and burn an egg.

Foaly took a deep breath and hoped that Julius would take his life saving lie as innocent truth. "Well. You see, you know that last dwarf smuggler?"

"Yes?"

"Wellll…Somehow or other a Mud cat had sneaked into his cargo and tagged along for the ride. I just decided to keep it.'

"Why wasn't it on the list?"

Foaly sighed and rolled his eyes in a way that one would match with someone trying to explain the simplest of concepts to no avail. "Becauuse, we only found it recently," Foaly decided to add a little something from Juliet to give the statement extra 'irritating Julius power'. "Duh."

Root's eye twitched. "Well, anyway. The reason I was just now going to find you was to get your monthly report."

"Oh."

"Come into the conference room, please."

"Yes Julius, but er-"Foaly looked behind him hoping that Holly would appear miraculously out of thin air.

"What?"

"Nothing."

Julius shrugged and led the way into the conference room, shutting the door after Foaly's tail was in, though he did admit he was sorely tempted to shut it a little before.

Foaly sat down across from Julius, a large stretch of smooth table separating them.

"Well? What's new in your department?"

"Quite a lot actually," Foaly set Artemis down on the table. The Mud boy turned kitten sat down, wrapping his tail around his lower body and staring at the commander.

"Such as?" Root drawled around a cigar, noxious wisps accompanying every syllable.

"Mostly top secret inventions that I'm putting finishing touches on," Foaly replied smugly as he reached out to pet Artemis again, feeling very much like an evil genius from one of those Mud man motion pictures.

Artemis growled and got up, padding to the other end of the table. Julius eyed the kitten warily as he laid down in front of him. "You're forgetting your place, civilian."

Foaly shrugged. "I'm indispensable. So, you can't sack me. They're my experiments and I assure you they will help the LEP. But that's all I'm saying, Julius."

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO CALL ME JULIUS!" Root banged the table with his fist, causing Artemis to bounce a foot in the air. Artemis panted as he clutched the table, then deciding that this end was no longer safe he made a mad dash for the other end. Unfortunately, the table was too slick for kitty claws. So, the effect was like a hockey puck. Artemis slid toward Foaly with increasing speed. Foaly's eyes widened and his arm instinctively whipped out to protect himself.

Funny thing, it seems hockey pucks, ping-pong balls, AND kittens ricochet. You had to feel sorry for the poor thing. This continued for a while longer, Root and Foaly playing ping-pong hockey with Artemis. The kitten even took turns swiping at both of them because Artemis Fowl II did not find this game in the least amusing. But, honestly, there was really no harm meant to the kitten, it was just an issue of self protection. The last time Artemis made a final sprint for the door, he made it. He skidded down the hall, scaring a few secretaries and saw his image of salvation. There was a gap on the ledge of the fountain between Kelp and his buddies. Artemis leapt and, wouldn't you know it, four left paws, missed. KER-SPLOOSH! What do' ya know, black cats really ARE unlucky.

**A.N** Holly probably would've enjoyed seeing that. But, we have to give Artemis some dignity….Oh wait….I think the whole kitten thing just kind of destroyed what shreds of pride he had left. But, don't worry! He'll get it back! He's ALWAYS does! Or does he? Dum dum dum! Anywho, what's gonna happen next? What else can go wrong? Will this turn out to be one of those clichéd "It was all a dream" stories! All these questions and more will be answered in the **_FINAL_** installment of **_It's Harder Than it Seems!_** But don't worry, it's extra long!

**IhateBeetroot- **I don't know which I like more either! Arigatiou gozaimasu! (Thank you very much!) Hai! (Yes!)

**HollyShortgirl- **Thank you! I think so too! Ooooo! I know! Thanks! Will do! Foaly is enjoying this WAY too much…Don't worry, you'll soon get to see how Holly reacts! And let me tell you, the tables will turn…

**I should be Studying- **I know! Artemis would be SO cute as a black cat! Goodness knows, Holly already thinks of him as one, with all the trouble he's caused her and the People. THANKS! Hm. Holly and Artemis? You'll see, huge pupp-kitty eyed one, you'll see…

**Lost Darkness- **For shame, Lost! Actually, I'm rather bad at it too…fetchboy84 is about ready to kill me….and she can, cause I know her in real life…as you already know……SOOOO GOOD TO HEAR FROM YOU! DO YOU LIKE THE STORY? DID I MENTION I MISS YOU? I MISS YOU! CAN YOU TELL I'M HYPER THAT YOU REVIEWED? YOU DIDN'T GIVE UP ON ME! _glomps you_ If you other people couldn't tell, I know Lost in real life too, but she goes to another high school, darn her….but she likes it, so what can I do, ne? We need to get together sometime!

**P.S. **Thank yous will be updated as other people read the fanfic! I promise not to forget anybody! But I only put thank yous of people who reviewed the previous chapter in the next chapter's thank yous! Oh, by the way, please don't think I'm stupid, but what is "natural soy"? I just heard it on a commercial and it caught my attention. Which, by the way, is not very hard to do.


	4. Promise Me

**A.N** OH MY GOSH! YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING! You're reviews just completely and TOTALLY made my day! Now, I wanted to update this chapter now because I'll be going on a trip tomorrow and I wanted to keep up with my quick updates. So, I hope you like the chapter and look out for new AF stories in the future!

**Disclaimer** **Me:** Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet and so are you. But that's not all, you are also wonderful and nice and cool and neat and…tall?

**Lawyers:** No way. He STILL doesn't belong to you.

**Me:** _thinks_ Hm. Eureka!

**Lawyers:** _narrows eyes_ What?

**Me:** His kitten form belongs to me!

**Jimmy the Head Squirrel Leader: **You idiots! I told you to strip her ownership of EVERYTHING Artemis Fowl!

**P.S** Thank yous are, as always, at the bottom!

**Promise Me**

Artemis coughed and sputtered and batted the water like it was his archrival. And, at the moment, it was. However, while Artemis was not in the least amused, Kelp and his buddies sure were. They did not question the kitten's strangeness of being there; they had heard the whole hall conversation. Kelp chuckled, but with sympathy in his eyes, stuck in a room with Foaly and Root? Ouch, that had to hurt. He smiled down at the kitten and plucked it up and into his lap. "Hey kitty, you're going to get a cold if you stay like this."

Artemis just glowered. This day had started out bad and had only gotten worse. The next person he saw he was most definitely going to grind into dust. But wait, cats can't talk, and thus can't criticize and ground into dust. Okay, his glare would have to do. Goodness knows it would send shivers up peoples' spines.

Well, it just so happened that the 'next person he saw' was mistaken for an angel by him.

"What are you guys doing now?" Holly asked innocently.

Kelp smiled, hoping that his cheeks were only warm, and not pink. "Saving innocent victims of course."

"Hm?"

The well known captain lifted the kitten to Holly's eye sight.

"Where did you get him?" Holly's eyes softened as she took the kitten from Kelp's hands.

"How do you know it's a he?"

"Just a feeling. He's got gorgeous eyes, hasn't he?"

"Yeah," Kelp's eyes narrowed. "Actually, to tell you the truth, they kind of remind me of someone."

Artemis could feel himself start to sweat, no matter how soothing Holly's hand was. His pride would not take another blow.

"Do you mind if I take him?"

"Huh?"

"Do you mind if I take the kitten home with me, I'm heading off now. The poor thing's soaked."

"No," Kelp replied then murmured: "In fact, I envy him."

Artemis could feel himself blush, going home with Holly. He gulped. It was easy for Holly; she didn't know she was stroking her former enemy. But that was okay. As long as she didn't know, he was content.

Holly was extra careful as she went home this time, holding her back pack to her chest gently. The kitten was in there after all. Mud anything usually lead to panic from civilians. But, surprisingly, even with all of the pushy-shovey people, they arrived home without incident. She opened her flat door and walked in, letting it shut behind her. She turned on the lamps with a command and a golden light filled the room. She opted for these dimmed lights rather than the ones that reminded her of her cubicle. She needed a haven, not that she didn't love her work, but even she got occasionally burnt out. She zipped the backpack open and watched as Artemis the kitten nudged his head out, one of his ear's perking up.

Artemis looked around as he felt his warm and fuzzy body being lifted out of the rough texture of the backpack. He had never seen where Holly lived before, and found it not necessarily predicted, but slightly expected. It was cozy and safe. Artemis twitched his tail in content, Holly observing.

Then a small breeze from the window reminded his body of his current state. So, as his body's protest, his tiny kitten form jerked forward as he sneezed in such a way that the captain felt compelled to snuggle the ball of fluff, no matter how wet. She brought Artemis up to her face and nuzzled noses with him, "You're so cute," she whispered.

Artemis felt like he had been struck by lightening, but instead of feeling stiff he melted. He didn't even notice Holly had grabbed a warm kitchen towel before he was being smothered with it, albeit gently. The world's greatest criminal mastermind could feel himself blushing, feeling thankful for his kitten body for the first time that day. Holly chuckled and strolled through the dim living room and into her bedroom. She sidestepped some paperwork and clothes, and then flopped onto her bed, sighing as she felt the kitten curl and softly change position on her chest. To tell the truth, Artemis was slightly uncomfortable. Holly was someone whom he respected immensely, and was this, really acceptable? Meaning, Holly did think he was an innocent kitten, but he knew. And that was all it took to feel slightly undeserving of this. He liked Holly. He liked her a lot.

"You know, you remind me of someone," Holly eased onto her elbows and scratched the kitten's ears. "Of course, you're obviously different in some respects. But the feel of you is the same," she stared into Artemis' stormy eyes and sighed. "The boy I'm speaking of has literally skipped his childhood or just decided to ignore it. I feel sorry for him. No matter how tough he acts, he's still just a boy and he's been through so much. Underneath all of the malice, calculations, plots, vampire smiles-"

So, she was talking about him. Artemis decided he couldn't really do anything in his current predicament except be the cute little confidant Holly was taking him for. There was really nothing much he could do. That is, save for enjoy it.

"-and his downright evil incarnate, little attitude-"

Artemis could feel his hair start to rise…she was getting angry.

"-he's a good kid," Holly's anger deflated abruptly.

Juliet had often shared parts of cartoons where the obnoxious characters did 'face faults' when they were completely surprised. Artemis was ashamed to say he almost did one at that moment. He looked up at Holly with wide, questioning eyes, trying to figure out how she had gone from being angry at him to saying he was a good kid. He was probably one of the world's most knowledgeable people on psychology, and yet he couldn't answer this question.

"Geez," Holly flopped back down and smiled at the kitten. "I'm always so confused around him. I don't know whether to kick him-"

Artemis recoiled slightly and winced, though he wasn't shocked at the statement. How many times had she punched him now? He shook his head. He would rather not recall the humiliation.

"-Or hug him."

Artemis eyes widened again. _'Hug? Holly…wants…to…hug…ME!'_

Holly's eyes narrowed. "You know what? He would probably be reacting the same way to my statements as you are."

Artemis could feel his heart speed up. He had to convince Holly he wasn't who he really was. So, he did the only thing that came to mind. "Meeeeeooooowwwwww!" Artemis meowed in the most endearing way possible.

Holly's serious face broke into giggles as she huggled the kitten. "Okay, maybe you're not him. Maybe he would, but I can't imagine the great Artemis Fowl meowing. Though, if you promise not to tell anyone-"

Artemis snuggled under her chin from an unknown reflex.

"He really is a good kid, and getting to be somewhat of a cute one too. He's even beginning to smile. Not maliciously, no smirk, no sneer, no cynical grin, just smile. I think hanging out with us is fueling that decent spark at his core…"

Artemis sighed and could feel himself drift into contented sleep as he continued to listen to Holly talk. Now she was just talking about work, life, and such things as one would put in a journal or diary. Though, he could hardly picture Captain Short having a diary.

Holly looked down and saw the kitty's eyes drift open and closed for the final time. She gently eased into a sitting position and moved him onto her lap. The kitten stretched, and then curled up again. Artemis yawned, his pink tongue dipping into the air and then back in, his face scrunching up and relaxing. Holly grinned and followed suit. "You're making me yawn, kitty."

Artemis just smiled.

Holly's smile grew wider, almost in satisfaction and victory at her well done pampering of this kitty. Especially so when she heard the low, soft purring of the black kitten. She looked up at the ceiling, closing her eyes too and enjoying the warmth of the kitty when said fluff ball suddenly gained a little more than a few pounds. Holly looked down, almost afraid of what she might find and found herself staring down at an extremely content Artemis, his hair still slightly wet and most definitely mussed. She sighed and let a small smile grace her lips, despite her irritation. "Alright Artemis, I'll let you go for now. But you just wait."

Artemis grinned. "I'll be interested to see what you have in store."

"Oh, by the way…"

Artemis peaked one eye open, wary of what she would say next.

"Did you switch the crown jewel on Lady Fei Fei's tiara with a fake."

Artemis sighed, reaching his hands up to rub his temples.

"Out with it Artemis. Now," Holly's voice was firm but calm, a deadly sign.

"You wouldn't believe me even if I told you."

"Did you make it into some weapon? A laser perhaps?"

"Good guess, but no."

"Then what?"

"Promise you'll believe me?"

Holly narrowed her eyes. Was this Artemis being unsure? It was almost as if he wanted her to believe him. "Promise."

"I put it on a chain and gave it to my mother. It's the exact hue of my father's eyes."

"And yours," Holly whispered.

"Yes. I promised her I would find my father."

"And you kept that promise."

"I keep my promises."

"Then promise **me** something."

"What?" Now it was Artemis's turn to narrow his eyes.

"Promise me you'll continue to blow on that spark. And maybe smile too."

"…"

"Artemis."

"All right. I promise."

Silence followed, Artemis shifting once to be closer to Holly. He hoped it went unnoticed. But then he thought of something and his gut churned slightly. His brow furrowed for a second. "So, this, erm, is okay?"

"It's okay just because you said something that wasn't a word."

Artemis smiled again, giving Holly the rare pleasure of seeing him truly smile and keeping his promise. 'He really is cute.'

**A.N** _grins_ I'm actually really proud of this fic. It's not perfect, but hey, what is perfect? Did you guys like the cuddle time? Don't worry. In the next AF story it'll be longer and maybe they'll even kiss. Who knows. But, I am a sucker for light romance…Next fic: **_Wicked: Artemis sped up for a final time and took a leap of faith, literally. He sailed through the air and tackled the awestruck fairy to the ground, landing in a two foot snow drift, with the disgruntled, female (Artemis realized upon tackling the poor thing) fairy underneath him. He got off the fairy, sat up, and took off his goggles just as the fairy ripped off her helmet to reveal….((ArtemisXHolly))_**

**IhateBeetroot- **I know! You will not BELIEVE how many times that scene ran through my head before it finally got down on paper/compie-chan! Sorry to say, this is the end of this fic, but there will be more!

**boogalaga- **Thank you! Thank you! THANK YOU! You're awesome! And yup, I managed to forward your review to Artemis and I ACTUALLY got a reply! So, here ya go:

Dear boogalaga:

I am quite aware that 'cuteness' is a very powerful force. But, it is one that I particularly do not like to use. Also, what makes you think I _want _a cat toy? They are somewhat amusing I admit but I would not let myself be caught dead with one. The same goes for cat nip; though Holly for some reason agrees with you (I hate it when she reads over my shoulder. She agrees with you on_ almost all_ accounts, by the way). The one she doesn't agree with is the women. For some reason she seemed irritated when she read that (no matter how likely it is to happen should the situation arise). But I do agree with you on that second to last statement. I do intend to try a bit more, but in my own body. Finally, I know how much I amuse my fans all too well.

Sincerely,

Artemis Fowl II

Did you like it? I hope you did! Thank you again! I will!

**Sqarecool321- **I know it! Thank you for reading and reviewing!

**Chaos- **Yay! I'm glad I made your day! Thank you! And yes, he does! But you already know that now! I hope it met your expectations! I think so too! Thanks!

**Lost Darkness- **Ah, as blunt and brutal as always, aren't you? Don't worry. I won't kill you, you'll just be unconscious. I'm a genius! YAHOO! That's a real compliment! ARIGATOU GOZAIMASU! Hm? Call you? With what? This thing? _pokes the phone with a stick_ What is it? _random crowd laughs _No, seriously, what **is** it?


End file.
